Truths about Internal Family Systems Therapy for Anxiety in San Francisco | Anxiety Therapy San Francisco

There are many misconceptions about what happens in a therapy session, and while you may have heard of Internal Family Systems therapy before, you could be unsure about what it actually entails. 

I’m here to provide you with informative and realistic truths about what you can expect in your therapy sessions using the IFS model to treat your anxiety.

Truth: There is nothing wrong with you.

If you walk away with a new understanding after reading these truths, this simple truth is the most crucial. Folks often come into therapy with the belief that they are damaged or broken, that the reason they are in pain is that there is something wrong with them. But it’s the belief that you are broken that actually harms you.

The fundamental belief of IFS therapy is that nothing is wrong with any of us. 

Rather, there are parts of us that may be acting in extreme ways because they’re protecting other, more vulnerable parts experiencing distress. These attempts at self-protection may include rage, substance abuse, avoidant behavior, and, of course, anxiety. 

The extreme parts of you that are acting out in ways that harm your life are trying to be of service to you in the only way they know how—by keeping your deepest vulnerability safe.

Truth: You are not your anxiety.

It’s common for us to identify fully with what we’re struggling with. In IFS, we call this “blending” with a part of ourselves. 

When we feel like we’re trapped in our anxiety, it’s easy to believe that it defines us. But your anxiety is just a part of the complex tapestry that forms who you are. It is one of many parts that are all simply trying to keep you safe. 

The work you’ll do in IFS therapy will help you access all your parts, even beyond your anxious self, and give you a deeper understanding of yourself that leads to compassion and understanding.

Truth: You will discover the underlying fears that drive your anxiety.

If we take our anxiety at face value, we’re only seeing the symptoms—not the root cause. 

Diving deeper into understanding your anxiety will lead you to the core fears beneath it. For some of us, there is the fear that if we let go of constantly worrying about the future, we won’t improve and will fall short in our lives. 

Sometimes our anxiety is rooted in perfectionism—that if we don’t do or say exactly the right thing at all times, we will be seen as unworthy. 

Practicing IFS therapy will guide you in accessing the most vulnerable parts of you that carry your core fears, and in doing so, will allow you to relate to them with compassion and curiosity. 

Your anxiety is always connected to something deeper, and when we uncover the truth of what your anxiety is protecting, you can begin to reduce its grip on you.

Truth: You will be asked to practice this work outside of sessions.

You will benefit most from therapy when you take what you practice in your therapy sessions and apply them to the rest of your life. 

Therapy is kind of like going to the gym with a personal trainer—you may not be working with your personal trainer every time you exercise, but you’re using the techniques you learn to help you build strength even when you’re on your own. 

As your therapist, I am by your side, supporting you and cheering you on, and sometimes challenging you. But I’m not with you all the time, and if you want to see the benefits of our work together, you’ll begin to try some of the things we practice out in the real world. 

When you return for our sessions, we can discuss how your “road test” went and explore what adjustments may be useful. And often, it will involve simply reveling in the incredible new thing that happened or the growth you were able to experience resulting from your practice—and do a victory lap around the room. 

And sometimes it’s grieving together, that even though you were courageous and challenged yourself to do ‘the thing’, it didn’t result in what you were hoping for.

In addition to the deep work we do in our therapy sessions, I’ll be providing you with self-inquiry tools you can apply to the rest of your life.

A free therapy consultation in San Francisco

I hope this illuminates more of how Internal Family Systems therapy views the treatment of anxiety. 

If IFS therapy in San Francisco sounds interesting to you, feel welcome to call me at (415) 851-5125 for a free 15-minute phone consultation. If you are looking for help with anxiety, you can read more about how I can help here. My specialties include anxiety, self-esteem, and relationship issues.