Finding a Therapist in San Francisco

There are a lot of therapists in San Francisco. How the heck do you choose one that’s right for you? Sometimes the process of finding a therapist can feel so overwhelming that it prevents someone from getting the help they need. If you’re looking for a counselor or therapist, I’d like to help you find someone who can help.

Here are some tips for how to choose a therapist:


1. Ask people you trust for a recommendation. If it feels comfortable, ask your friends, family members, or coworkers if they know of any therapists or see a therapist they like. Good questions to ask: What do they like about their therapist? Do they feel that they’ve made progress in their therapy goals?

Note on sharing therapists: For some people it may feel uncomfortable to “share” therapists, so ask if they would mind if you were to see the same therapist as them. The risk of seeing the same therapist as a loved one may be that you could end up censoring what you say in therapy sessions. The benefit is that your therapist has a systemic view of what’s happening in a family or friend group, and this insight might aid the progress of therapy. Keep in mind that a therapist is legally obligated to keep what you say in therapy confidential, unless you consent to a release of information or you or someone else is in imminent danger. Also note that, depending on the therapist’s theoretical orientation, they may have boundaries around seeing people from a tight social or family circle. Be sure to ask the therapist during your initial phone consultation. 

2. Type in the search engine what you’re looking for or struggling with in particular. For instance, you can type in “anxiety therapist” or “relationship therapy”. This can help you find a therapist who specializes in the area of your life that you need the most support with, therefore increasing your chances of reaching your specific therapy goals

3. Your connection with your therapist matters. It’s difficult to determine from an initial phone consultation whether or not you have a connection. Just like any relationship, a therapeutic connection with a therapist builds over time. Keep this in mind during your first phone call with a prospective therapist. Good questions to ask yourself: Could you imagine opening up to this person? Did you feel that your struggles were validated? Check in with how you feel after the conversation. Are you eager to begin therapy with them? Do you feel nervous but open to seeing where it goes? On their website, blog, or social media content, do they seem to “get” you and your struggles? Do they understand how societal systems shape your lived experience?

4. Some therapy orientations may resonate more with you than others.  Although all therapists aim to help people make positive changes in their lives, there are many different approaches one can use to help people get there. A therapeutic model is a roadmap a therapist uses to understand a client’s struggles and develop solutions.

Now, you don’t need to go down a rabbit hole of research on each psychotherapy theory. But you can check a prospective therapist’s website to see the therapy approaches they specialize in, do a quick search and read a blurb on those theories, and ask yourself if the description of that approach sounds interesting or potentially helpful to you.

5. If your ideal therapist has a full schedule and is currently unavailable (and you’re not in an immediate crisis), ask these questions:

  • Do they have a waitlist?

  • Do they send out a newsletter announcing openings in their schedule?

  • Can they provide a recommendation for a therapist that uses a similar approach? 

A free therapy consultation in San Francisco

I hope this helps you find the right therapist in San Francisco. If you are still feeling stuck, feel free to call me at (415) 851-5125 for a free 15 minute phone consultation. I’d be happy to hear about your situation and help direct you to the right person. If you are looking for help with anxiety, self-esteem, or improving your relationships, you can read more about my therapeutic approach here.

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What to Expect from Therapy in San Francisco

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How to Say No to a Mullet: Using Internal Family Systems to Stop People-Pleasing